Saturday, March 27, 2010

Life After Surgery

Ok... I'll try to update you as best I can on my surgery (still on pain meds and not feeling well at all). Get comfortable, it's going to be a long post.
Jason's parents came to watch Kohen for us while we were in Tulsa Thursday-Saturday. Kohen was so excited to see them and loved being able to spend so much time with them. Of course, I cried as we drove away because I missed my baby already. We arrived in Tulsa late Thursday night. I walked into our hotel room and to my surprise there was a HUGE spa in the middle of the BEDROOM, not the bathroom, but right beside the big king bed!!! LOL! Jason got the "Romance Package" for us that night at the hotel. Yes, I know TMI, but my husband knew I was going to be out of commission for awhile and wanted me to have one last relaxing "bath" before my surgery :) Seriously, it was great. I felt like I was swimming in a swimming pool because the spa was so big! Then came the sexy part.... I had to wash my body AND hair with that red dye stuff they use in surgery!!!! Not quite the picture perfect moment Jason was hoping for!!!LOL! I had to do the dye thing AGAIN the next morning too, along with not using any styling products, lotions, soaps, makeup or anything like that. I was looking fabulous and smelled very.... sterile. I had filled tons of prescriptions before my procedure, including valium. Valium, really??? I thought only crazy people who had trouble flying on airplanes needed valium! It said to take it 30 minutes before surgery. I did not take it. First of all, I hate taking medicine and second, I wanted to be in my right mind while talking to the doctor! So, we show up and they call me back immediately. I changed into a hospital gown and a nurse took me to take a pregnancy test (just to be sure). After finding out I was not preggo, the nurse walked me back to the room with 2 doctors, 3 nurses and Jason. I smiled really big and said "I'm PREGNANT!!!". Haha. They thought that was pretty funny :) From there, I took my gown off and the doctor started drawing on me. I was covered with marks. I told him that I used to get so mad at my art students when they would color on themselves with Sharpie- and look at me now!!! After the marks were made we talked about cup size. The last bra I bought was for my brothers wedding last year and that was a 36 F. But I can also squeeze into a DDD. SO, I told the doctor I would like to be a C. He said he didn't really go by cup size but by what would be proportionate for my body.
I said my goodbye's to Jason and they took me to the prep room. I got to sit in the most comfortable chair in the world while they asked me questions and started my IV. They asked me if I was scared and I told them no. I wasn't. The hardest part had been leaving my baby. They then took me to another room. The door said the "Bellagio Suite". I told her I liked the looks of that :). I walked into a huge white/stainless steel room. Nurses were covered from head to toe, working on trays of instruments. There were huge lights pointing towards this single table in the middle of the room. There was even an observatory window up above. The anesthesiologist helped me up onto the table. She showed me the mask she was about to put on me and I said "I feel like I'm on an episode of Nip/Tuck". Everyone laughed. She told me it was pretty much the same as Nip/Tuck but she assured me no one would be having sex while operating on me! LOL! I told her thank you and I appreciate that! HA! Last thing I remember was she put the mask on me and told me to just breath. I prayed. I think I prayed to God about 3 prayers before I was out....
Jason said that surgery lasted about 2 hours. We stayed at the surgery center that night, so Jason was able to wait in our room instead of the waiting room. The nurse came in and told him everything went great, I was in recovery and would be there shortly. Jason said as soon as they brought me in the room in a wheelchair, he could tell, even through my hospital gown that my boobs were a LOT smaller! He knew I was going to be happy. I slept pretty much most of the day. When I finally came to my senses, the very first thing I noticed is that I could BREATH. I know that sounds funny, but really, I could breath so easy! I never knew it was hard to breath or that it took effort. But I felt, literally, like a brick had been lifted off of my chest! The second thing I did was look down. I said "I don't have any boobs, they're gone!". This worried me a little. I still wanted boobs, just not huge boobs! Jason assured me that I still had boobs. That afternoon my doctor came in to check on me. We asked him some questions concerning insurance and what insurance companies typically considered a "medical" surgery verses a "cosmetic only" surgery. We never even looked into trying to get insurance to help pay because I had never been to the doctor before about backaches, etc. The doctor said that typically insurance companies considered a cosmetic case to be anything lower than about 350 grams removed per breast. We were surprised to hear that my doctor removed 700 grams (yes, I said SEVEN HUNDRED) in ONE of my breasts and 695 g's in the other!!! Holy cow! So we will definitely be looking into insurance to help a little! After hearing that I was convinced I was back to being flat chested just like in middle school!
We left Tulsa on Saturday. Jason's parents and my parents were at our house to greet us. I don't really remember much, it's sad to say but I don't even really remember seeing Kohen much :( Jason's parents left and my parents stayed through the weekend. On Sunday night, My brother and Kristin came to report for duty :) Scott had to leave the next day but Kristin stayed until Tuesday night. I think I owe her like a million dollars for everything she did for me during the time she was here. She took such good care of me. By the last day she knew exactly where to place each ice pack, where to put each pillow, what meds I needed to take and what time to take them, she even had to "doctor" my bandages on my boobs, including drying them with a hair dryer after showers! LOL! She did all of this PLUS take care of Kohen! AND she did laundry and cleaned! Like I said, I owe her BIG time!!!! Jason took off work that Wednesday through Friday. He too did a great job taking care of me and Kohen! Kohen has turned into a daddy's boy this past week. There have been several occasions that I've cried because he will go to Jason before me now :( It's been over a week and I still haven't been able to hold my baby :(
Jason, Kohen and I went back to Tulsa this Friday for my one week check up. The doctor took off the bandages and replaced it with brown tape stuff. He said they looked great. I think they look like they've been chewed up by pit bulls... I know, I know... be patient. My doctor told me that I didn't have to wear my hospital support bra anymore, I could wear a real bra now. I was SO excited and couldn't wait to go to Victoria's Secret after we left! I was excited to tell the girl working at VS that I didn't know what size I wore because I had just had a breast reduction and I needed to be fitted! So the little 18 year old measured me. She said "I would try a 40 D". I said WHAT?????? 40????? I told her that was a lot bigger than even BEFORE my reduction! And a D!!!!!!! I thought I told the doctor I wanted to be a C!!!!!!! I told the girl thanks, and I would look around. I got a size 36 D bra and a size 36 C bra and went into the dressing room. No way, no how could I get my swollen, bruised, cut up boobs into that D bra. I was devastated. I refused to try on a bigger bra. We left. I felt the tears coming. By this time I was past due for my pain meds and very emotional. Jason convinced me to go to Dillard's and get someone to help me there. I explained to the sweet (grown) lady about my reduction. She was so helpful and gentle with me. She was very compassionate and took extra special care of the VERY swollen parts under my arms (it feels like the patch of skin between my boobs and my back is filled with water). Anyway, I told her I needed a bra to get me through the next 3 weeks (that's when my swelling is supposed to start going down). She found me the perfect bra- Even though it still has the letter "D" on the tag. I ended up breaking down into a crying out loud mess in the parking lot. I asked Jason to just hug me. He did, then we got into the car and headed back to Arkansas. I called my mom and cried and cried again. I told her I didn't need her to explain to me that it will just take time. I told her I needed her to just listen and agree with me that it sucks. She did. I felt better.
So now it's today. I still feel like crap. My boobs are a little smaller but still very swollen. I'm not going to go bra shopping for a very long time. I can't lift my arms above my shoulders, I can hardly brush my hair. Tomorrow I will HAVE to start holding my baby, even if I bust a gut doing it. I don't regret having this surgery and yes, it is LESS painful than my c-section, but I'm an instant gratification kind of a girl and I'm just ready for things to be back to normal, but with smaller boobs...

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Be Careful What You Wish For!

I realize this may be an inappropriate post, but I'm pretty much an open book and I just want to document what's going on in our lives! I'm having breast reduction surgery in 8 days. I know those of you who read my blog and haven't seen me since high school are thinking "What???"!!! Probably because I used to get made fun of for being flat chested! I remember when I would go to the pool with my friends and it would be my turn to jump off the diving board. I was always so self conscious of my chest size. I would always wrap my arms around my chest as I was walking to the end of the diving board to try and "cover up" my flat chest! I even remember back in middle school making "potions" (don't laugh, you KNOW you did it too!) with my friends to try and make our boobs grow. I would pray, and wish and wonder why God didn't give me boobs. Well, God heard me. Loud and clear. I guess you could say I was a late, very late, bloomer. So now, I'm stuck with these gargantuan boobs that could possibly have their own zip code :). Most people would love to have big boobs, but those people don't understand how it affects EVERYTHING. 1. Clothes. I have to buy huge shirts/dresses to fit my bra size. 2. Exercise. I have to wear at least THREE sports bras when I exercise and even then I have to hold my chest most of the time if I'm jumping or anything like that. Therefore, I hate to exercise. I like to play golf but it's hard to hold a golf club and swing through correctly without my boobs getting in the way! 3. Grandma bras. My bras are so not cute. I'm tired of the huge multiple clasps and wide padded straps. 4. Uncomfortable. I'm just so uncomfortable. I'm ready for a change.
My surgery will be in Tulsa on March 19th. I'm pretty scared. I'm ready for it to be done and over with! I've heard many success stories from people who have had this surgery or know someone who has. I pray it works out well for me too! Victoria's Secret HERE I COME!!!

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Rocking Chair

This is Kohen and me! I'm not sure how old I was here...Mom, do you know???

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Pretty Gross Post

I just thought I should log Kohen's first "real" throw-up.... The sad thing is, it was his Daddy's fault (just being honest, LOL!). It all started when Jason decided to give Kohen a million strawberries plus chocolate milk, followed by playing very hard. I was busy in the guest room unpacking boxes and I could hear Jason and Kohen in K's room. Kohen was laughing SO hard, over and over. They were rolling on the floor playing. About 10 minutes later I came in to put Kohen to bed. I did my little bedtime ritual where I turn off the lights, turn on the sound machine/projector, give Kohen his little blue blanket, sing You are My Sunshine and Amazing Grace, then I gently lay him in his crib. As I was laying him in his crib the thought crossed my mind- "yay, I get to go watch the Bachelor!".... Not so fast. Before I could even get my arms out of the crib, Kohen stood up and projectile vomited EVERYWHERE. Over and Over he vomited. Whole (actually, cut) strawberries were coming out of his nose. Chocolate milk was spewing out of his mouth. He was crying, choking, vomiting again and again. I was screaming Jason's name. Everything was covered in vomit-my arms, Kohen's face and p.j.'s, the sheets and mattress pad, his monogramed crib bumper, his little blue blanket plus other blankets hanging on the side of the crib, the crib head board and rails, the carpet...all covered in vomit...oh it even got on the wall as I was carrying him to the bathroom....
Jason got Kohen, the crib, and the carpet clean while I worked on the crib bumper, sheets, and mattress pad...
Kohen was as good as new. He continued to just play and watch tv while we were in cleaning mode. He feels great this morning so I know it wasn't a virus....just too many stawberries and chocolate milk :) Oh, and I did eventually get to watch the Bachelor!

(by the way, that's pedialyte in his sippy cup, not chocolate milk...)